Washing away stress with shower therapy



A warm shower soothes the body and soul.

 I shower every day. Well, almost every day. In the winter, when my skin gets too dry, my doctor told me not to shower every day.

"Yuck," I said.

"Just wash the important parts," he responded.

Even yuckier. Yes, my doctor said that to me. Ha! And no, I didn't need him to tell me which are the important parts.

Well, he was right. Skipping a shower here and there was just what my dry skin needed.

Thank goodness, though, that I don't have to go without showering too frequently. Showering is good for me. And not just because when I shower I won't stink and people will like me better.

A good shower is great therapy.

How so? How did I arrive at this conclusion?

In early years of adulthood as a young mother, I thought showering was a time suck. I remember at one point even commenting how showering seemed such a waste of time. I wished for a better, quicker way to get and stay clean.

Every day, the same thing over and over. So routine, washing from top to bottom, head to toe. Necessary, but boring. I could be doing so many other more important things with that time.

No wonder I was bored with such a mundane task. Every other demand was so much more exciting for someone who wanted to move, move, move to get things done.

It truly was hard to multi-task in the shower. I was a resistant captive. All I could do then was wash quickly while worrying about what I could be doing instead of showering.

How could I relax in the shower when I had an impatient newborn waiting to breastfeed right outside the shower door in a rocking carry cradle? I stopped washing over and over to reach out to stick a pacifier in mouth and rock the cradle.

I had toddlers to tend to. I had laundry to do, meals to prepare.

Those days are long gone and shower time is no longer interrupted by wee little ones scurrying through my bathroom, asking me questions or wanting my attention.

No longer is a busy household waiting reluctantly for me to get out of the shower and make things happen for them.

All my children are adults now and one of them is even pregnant with our first grandbaby. I recently recounted for her some of the challenges showering when you have young children.

So she wouldn't think it was just her, I shared that every new mother should consider showering each day quite an accomplishment.

I can't remember for sure, though, when I made the switch in my thinking, but a shower for me is no longer a necessary evil, a waste of time. Now I view my shower more like a well-deserved luxury, something to anticipate and enjoy. 

Why the new outlook? With time, I've grown as a person and slowed down some with fewer expectations of all that I need to accomplish each day, so I don't think it's just that I have figured out how to multi-task in the shower.

Multi-task in the shower, you wonder? Yes, but it's not frantic overachieving. It's more like mindful meditation.

You've heard of the slow food movement? This is the "slow shower movement" that I engage in. Finally, I've coined a term! I googled to check...

My shower time is slow-moving brain time. Time to relax and and be with myself.

I get a lot done in the shower. What do I do there besides scrubbing and rinsing?

Scented natural soaps make me happy while I think in the shower.

As I soap up and let the water trickle over me,

I listen to my inner voice. I've written about my i.v. before.  A shower is a perfect quiet time to think about concepts I'm intrigued with: happiness, spirituality, positive thinking, being the best me I can be.

I can be tough on myself in the shower, and I don't mean that I'm roughing up my skin with the loofah. My inner voice pulls no punches and tells me like it is. And I listen because I know it's all good for me.

I think through issues and solve problems. How should I creatively handle this or that? What did I do right yesterday or today? What can I do better tomorrow?

Some of my most strategic and innovative ideas have come to me in the shower. It's amazing how some warm water and time alone can clear my head and foster productive thinking.

I rehearse dialogue. So now I've arrived at a solution, but it's all in my head. No solution is a good one if you can't effectively communicate. How will I handle an important conversation? What points should I make? Where will I stand strong and where am I willing to compromise?

My shower is a great place to strategically work it all out and practice diplomacy for effective win-win outcomes in all walks of my life.

I draft my to-do list. What do I need to accomplish today? What can I plan for tomorrow? What has to happen right now to keep our everyday life running as smoothly as possible? I can be practical.

But way more fun...

I write my blog. It's amazing how many ideas come to me under the shower head. I've written whole passages under water. Heck, I've written entire posts. Sometimes I'm so excited by a good idea that I ache to write it down. Sometimes I find the time to. Sometimes I don't.

I invent. Hey, there's an idea from within the shower walls! In my spare time, invent a shower widget for dictation and recording any great ideas I'm lucky enough to have. Now where's that spare time?

What else?

I daydream. In the shower, there's built-in time to imagine. Why does the red bird peck on my bathroom window every day, all day long? Does he see his reflection or want to come in? What should I make for a special dinner? Where should I hike this weekend? Where should I vacation next? What's my next adventure? What do I want to be when I grow up?

I accept what is and explore possibility. Reflecting in the shower lets me focus on the power of the present, define expectations I may have for myself, and plan for the future.

With no outside distractions, digging deep inside my soul, I can honestly assess my overall wellness, determine when I need to make a course correction to get myself back on a path, and figure out what I should do to manage any stress I may be experiencing.

I told you I get a lot done in the shower. I've learned to multi-task and use that time wisely, even if it's just to think about how damned good that warm water feels on my tired, achy body and soul.

I appreciate that I can shower every day. Not everyone is so fortunate and I know that.

I want to stay healthy for myself and those I love, so this reserved time has become for me a cathartic, restorative therapy of sorts, dedicated to slowing me down and enriching my day-to-day existence.

The cost is my time and maybe a higher water bill, but if it has saved me dollars in potential doctor bills or psychotherapy, then it's time and money well spent.

I take my time now. I relish the routine. Before I know it, I'm all clean. Inside and out.

The healing power of water renews not only my physical body, but also my spirit and soul, giving me energy in the morning to move on with my day, or in the evening, to settle a tired mind for a restful night's sleep.

Good shower therapy enables me to better use all the tools in my toolbox, helping me fret less and move past any worries to better live my life on this good earth.

I'm no mathematician, but here's a silly little formula for some good shower therapy:

Warm water/soap + time to think = clean (inside + out) = good mental health = < $$ (medical bills) =  life to the nth degree.

This math is working for me. How about you?

What's your shower deal? Time suck or time to renew? I'd love to hear from you.

Until next time, yours in showering our way to a better world...Therese

Just call me Grammy?

Times they are a-changin'. One of my children is having a child. I'm going to be a grandparent. I'm not sure where all the time has gone to get me to this point, but life is sweet.

Being a grandparent is a time to cherish. Everyone tells tales about how great it is. For most, having a grandchild is the first opportunity to enjoy little ones without all the day-to-day responsibilities of raising your own children. The saying goes, "With grandchildren, you get to have all the fun and then send them home to mom and dad for all the work."

Lois Wyse wisely wrote, "If I had known how wonderful it would be to have grandchildren, I'd have had them first."

I'm looking forward to being a grandparent. As early as when my daughter was contemplating conception she asked me, "So what do you want to be called?"

"What do you mean?"

"You need to pick a name. Everyone's doing it. And ideally each grandparent should have a unique name."

Hmm. My mom's mother was my "grandmom." My dad's mom lived in Italy and I only met her once for an extended visit as a child. I referred to her as "nonna," Italian for grandma, when I visited, but in my child's mind every day of my life she was simply my dad's mom, my other grandmom.

That's not how it goes today. Today, grandmoms are encouraged to think about and decide what they want to be called. It's deemed important, I hear, to claim your name early on, especially in families with remarriage and multiple sets of grandparents.

Okay, I thought, what do I want to be called? Some grandmothers don't like "grandmotherly" names because they don't want others to perceive them as old enough to be a grandparent.

That's not me. I don't care what others think. I'm happy being young at heart.

And besides, it makes no sense to waste time worrying about growing older when:

1. It's better than the alternative, dying.
2. It's smarter to be grateful for the honor to be a grandparent on this good earth.

I certainly wouldn't consider shirking the esteemed title of grandparent, but which specific grandmother name is right for me if I have to claim one?

Some families make it easy by picking one grandmother name for everyone and just appending the family name after that. Simple.

Grandmom Smith. Grandmom Wilson. Grandmom Brooks.

But I don't want to be Grandmom Brooks. That was my mother-in-law.

Then there are all those who want to influence the grandmother name choice with their own preferences.

A security guard at work thinks I should be a nana. She said that word with love in her eyes and I knew that name elicited special memories, respect, and admiration. Awww.

I explained, though, that I can't be a nana. Besides the fact that I don't feel like a nana, that name is taken on both sides of the family for many years now by great and great-great grandparents.

One of my aunts said I should be called "mom mom" like her. Nice for you, auntie, but it doesn't feel right for me, although I just can't put my finger on why not.

It's a gut feeling and one based on my previous grandmotherly experience. You assumed this post is about my first grandbaby, so what experience, you're asking, right? This is my first human grandbaby. I do already have what I call grandpuppies, though.

As most young couples, our children started with dogs, you know, to try out the parenting thing.

Good for all because we can see they'll be great parents! The puppies are thriving and well-cared for.

We are a family of dog lovers, and as most Americans, we've personified our canine babies and tell them that "mommy and daddy" love them every day.

So it was natural to chat it up with our grandpuppies and let them know that "grammy and pop pop" love them, too.

Hmmm. Grammy. Where did that come from? I dunno. It just came out without thinking. But it sounded right to me. Grammy. Like a grand mommy.

Actually, I have a friend who wanted to be called grandmommy. Many discouraged her, advising that it would be too much of a mouthful for a little one. She stood her ground. Lo and behold, the little one articulates the name she loved. Kids are smart.

But let's be realistic. Any of us may finally settle on our special chosen name, all to receive a special moniker that your lovely grandbaby decides to assign you.

We saw this with our first child. Hubby and I referred to our moms as "grandmoms" to our son from day one, but what eventually came out of the little guy's mouth was a "ba-da" (pronounced like the "ba" in bat, with the quick add-on of the "da" in dad).

Ha! This little one, who could string together a two-word sentence, noun and verb, at nine months, couldn't say "grandmom"! Maybe he could, but they just didn't look like grandmoms to him? Maybe they looked like ba-das. After all, my little one actually figured out how to distinguish his great grandmoms from his grandmoms, calling them great ba-da! Kids are amazing.

So, with our second child, a daughter, we thought she'd pick up on "ba-da" from her brother who was still using that name or maybe even "grandmom" from us. But no. She called her grandmoms "mimi."

With our third child, another daughter, with all these choices in front of her, we didn't know early on what she would call her grandmoms. And we wondered awhile because this one didn't choose to talk much until she was two plus. The doctor assured us she was fine.

Why would our youngest need to talk when she had a brother and a sister who said everything for her and got her everything she needed before she had to ask? By the time the last little one was talking, she clearly called our moms "grandmom" as we referred to them. At that point, all the kids said "grandmom."

Based on experience then, I'm aware that the little one may name me, but I don't think it's a bad idea to go through the exercise anyway to think about how I would like to be addressed by the precious offshoot of my own offspring.

As I've written about previously, we don't get to name ourselves the first time, and whether you may or may not like your given name, I say, if you have an opportunity to choose your own in a later round, take the time to choose one that ideally reflects how you see yourself.

In choosing a name, it can be easier to cross names off the list than to decide on the right one, however, since we all bring our own context into the equation, especially when we know someone else with the name under consideration.

Starting this exercise I had enough input from others, so I decided it was time to do some random googling. There are lots of suggestions out there, for sure, so I worked through some lists to see if any names fit.

I pondered some choices and instinctively knew right up front names that may affectionately work for others, but that just aren't right for this girl:

• Big Mom - NOOO! Why would I voluntarily ask to be called "big." :)
• G-mom - This just seemed a bit too utilitarian.
• Gram - I'll always wonder if the grandbaby wants a cracker.
• Gramma - Did we just not know how to spell "Grandma"?
• Grams - It will be maybe twenty years before the grandbaby is a hepcat.
• Grandmama - Pretentious. Not working for me.
• Grannie, Granny - I don't sit in a rocker all day on the front porch.
• Grandmother - Too formal. I can't be that rich Dynasty bitch.  
• Ma, Maw, Memaw, MawMaw - I don't live in the South.
• Nanny - I'm not paid help.
• Mamo - I don't live in SeaWorld®.

You get how this exercise works. 

Although it sounded fun, I also couldn't see myself as a "GiGi" because even though I like to dress up here and there, the name seemed somewhat frou-frou for who I am every day.

Besides, I'd already have an awkward acquaintance with a GiGi-like name. Years ago, when my first niece was born I wondered if she could say "Aunt Therese." I thought until she could, maybe she might start by calling me "TT" for Therese. That would be easy enough for a toddler.

Only problem was that I didn't  know how I should spell that. Neither did anyone else.

TT? Tee-Tee? TeeTee? Aunt TT? Ti-Ti? Ti Ti? TiTi? Okay, if I'm not strict about the capitalization and spacing I could envision being an aunt titty. And that just didn't sit well.

It all worked out, though. Funny thing was that my niece could say Aunt Therese before we could all decide on the spelling of my auntie nickname. Smart kid. Adults, maybe not so much. It was all too much work.

Based on that experience, I'm now going nowhere near any of the cool, trendy, hip (a.k.a. masquerading) grandmom names I'm hearing. I'm never going to be a:

• BeBe - Trauma from the TiTi incident.
• Bella - I have a dog with that name.
• GiGi - See BeBe.
• G-Ma - Maybe if I were married to G-Man.
• Honey - My last name isn't Boo Boo.
• Lovey - I'm not shipwrecked.
• MayMay - Urban dictionary definition: A dumbass. A loser.
• Mia - Sadly brings back memories of my POW/MIA bracelet from the Vietnam era.

"Glamma" came up, but it's also not me. Although I may wear the occasional suit and heels to work or clean up well for a special event, I'm most comfortable in my jeans, Life is Good® t-shirts, and Keens®. "Glamma" is not quite the right accessory for this nature-loving hiker chick.  

A good friend Kathy goes by the name "Greka." I always assumed the origin was ethnic, but couldn't place from where. Recently we chatted about this and Kathy explained that she took the "Gre" from her husband Greg's name and the "Ka" from her own name to add up to "Greka."

This solution was especially touching since Greg passed away and Kathy mourned that he wouldn't know his grandchildren. That name to her signifies that Greg is always with her and their grandchildren.

At this point in my quest I realized there are so many ways to go and things to consider. This online quiz piqued my interest: Which Grandmother Name Suits You Best?

An easy and fun quiz to take, I answered twenty questions to receive results with advice and direction on the category of name and why it fits you best.

Here are my results. I'd say they are on to something about me.


 
So maybe I should go ethnic. I could easily be an Italian Nonna or a German Oma since both cultures are part of my ancestral heritage. And although I'm also of French descent and my name Therese is French, I couldn't be a Grandmere. Again, this sounds too grand for me. Although I'm not Hawaiian, Tutu is appealing since my name begins with "T" until I remember the TiTi naming incident.

As I continue this naming journey, the pragmatic side of me will surely consider how my chosen name goes with my partner's grandparent name. Although, men don't think too hard about this stuff, it seems.

When asked, hubby quickly and confidently stated his preference to be called Pop Pop because that's what he called his grandfather and what our children called our fathers. Preggy daughter wants a change with "Poppy" for her dad, though, so this will be interesting. I have a feeling he'll say Pop Pop and she'll follow with her assigned diminutive as his nickname.

I'm at the end of this naming exercise, but I'll be honest. I'm still not sure who I'll be to this new child.

I may still pick Grammy, where I started with the grandpups, but who knows? Grandbaby with his/her lack of articulation may call me Gammy, Gummy, Grummy, or Gumby. And that's okay.

At the end of the day, I'm happy to know that I'll take what I get and answer to any or all of these names that may come from this precious little one.

If I may take some liberty and do a hatchet job to William Shakespeare's eloquent words as written in Romeo and Juliet:

"That which we call a grandma. By any other name would smell as sweet."

So true. But, no, it's not fair to botch up the master's words.

Shakespeare actually referenced the rose in those lines. 

But Shakespeare did write this about a grandma, for real:

"A grandma's name is little less in love than is the doting title of a mother."

Ah, yes. That's it. Whatever grandmother name is chosen by me or grandbaby, it will stand for love and baby will know it.

Grammy. Nonna. Oma. Maybe I'm a Baba. Grandbaby will confirm when s/he is ready.

I'll keep you posted.

Until next time, yours in fun and family...Therese (or Grammy?)

P.S. In the meantime, tell me what you think. Share your family's grandmother names, your own chosen name, how you got it, or any ideas you have for me. I'd love to hear from you.

Sleepcation, anyone?

Durn, I thought I coined a new term. Sleepcation. I googled it and found lots of results. Funny thing, I also found others who were disappointed to learn that they hadn't themselves created the new word either. But yet they were excited as I was that they were on to something.

It seems lack of sleep is a trend on the rise. There's just so much fun stuff to do in this world, we're not taking enough time to sleep.

So maybe the idea of taking a sleepcation is relatively new, but we all know that "staycation" has become a well-used term, as downturns in the economy have left folks fearful to spend money and happier to stay home when they have time off.

Nowadays, no one bats an eye when anyone declares a staycation to use cherished time off from work to take day trips to local wonders, work on the house or even just relax and read in their own backyard.

Although I'm always up for adventure and travel, I'm happy to say that I've taken my share of staycations and have enjoyed them. The promise of a week ahead when you really have no commitments and can do whatever you want is appealing. Your mind races as you imagine all that you can get done.

Wait! You're not supposed to be doing too much, but, alas, that's not how it usually works out for me.

Sure, you'd think these stay-at-home vacations would be quite relaxing, but I somehow manage to turn a staycation into a housework-cation. Hey, I say, it's a perfect time to get stuff done that there's never enough time for! "Working my fingers to the bones-ville" is many times the destination for my staycation.

By the end of the housework-cation with all that manual labor, I'm absolutely ready to go back to my desk job in the office. This is a theme I hear frequently from co-workers, so I know I'm not alone.

So after two staycations this past July and August, I took a well-deserved spa-cation in early September. Spa-cation. What's that? Another new word with many search results. This one hasn't made Merriam-Webster yet, though.

What comes to mind when you think of a spa? Pampering? Rejuvenation? Wellness? Relaxation?

When friends hear I frequently go to a spa for a week, most imagine a posh resort where I'll drink champagne by a pool, get a mani and a pedi, and chill out on a massage table. I throw my head back and laugh. Haha!

The massage part is true, but the rest is not the spa experience I usually choose, not that I don't appreciate some good champagne and a nice mani/pedi. My preference, though, is to work my butt off at the spa...literally. How do I spell "spa"? B-O-O-T-C-A-M-P. And I love it.

At most spas, you can choose to do as much or as little as you please, but for me, I can't help but partake in all the activities at hand. It's in my DNA to try it all.

My favorite spa destination, Deerfield Spa, one of the most affordable destination spas in the U.S., does pamper me anyway. Although I definitely appreciate the delicious and healthy meals served on a covered table with china and crystal, along with the relaxing massages throughout my stay, the lure for me at the spa is certainly the lineup of classes and activities.

A spa-goer since 2006, I look forward to receiving my fresh copy of the daily activity schedule at check-in. That piece of paper is the promise of all that the week can hold for me. The first night, I'll circle everything I want to do during my stay.

And I want to do it all. Every type of exercise class you can imagine, pool aerobics, lectures, cooking demonstrations, and my favorite of all, half-day or all-day, naturalist-guided hikes in the area. I do it all.

I work hard at my play, so I thrive on the business of my chosen spa schedule. Surprisingly, despite my full agenda, I come home from the spa relaxed and rejuvenated. I did what I wanted to do and I'm pleased with the results. Feeling healthy, toned, and losing a few LBs...who wouldn't be?

I am happy, though, for friends who choose to sit at the pool all day and meet up with me at meals. I believe everyone should do what makes them happy.

Even though I tend to jam-pack my spa week, I still relish here and there a catnap in a hammock or a rock on the front porch. There's nothing like thinking of nothing, drifting off to the sounds of nature, and feeling the warmth of the sun and the breezy, fresh air across my face.

Those wonderful sleeps get me thinking about the idea of a sleepcation. Hey, back to the cool, but not so unique, idea I started this post with!

As noted earlier, everyone's thinking the same thing. Apparently, lack of sleep is a widespread problem in our fast-paced, nonstop society. Who knew?

Hotels are seeing opportunities to market sleepcations for weary workers and exhausted new parents. The sleep-deprived are easily enticed with the prospect of an escape to a resort or even just a quiet local hotel to sleep and rest.

But then you may have to deal with noisy hall dwellers, room attendants, and even outside sounds. So I say hibernate in your own humble abode if you can. Why spend money when you'll be most comfy in your own bed and digs?

If it's not quiet on your homefront, do what you've got to do to make it so. Plan your sleepcation like you plan your vacation.

This sleepcation idea is definitely on my radar. I know I may have to work hard at doing nothing, but when I have a goal, I am motivated. Maybe I can manage my sleepcation like I manage a project. Task-based.

Now I'm just being silly. But how does this look?

My Sleepcation

 1.  Sleep late.
 2.  Wake up.
 3.  Enjoy some breakfast goodies.
 4.  Tuck in the blankets.
 5.  Read some.
 6.  Take a break from reading and nap.
 7.  Roll out of bed and stretch.
 8.  Nosh on a light lunch.
 9.  Curl up in favorite chair and read some more.
10. Drift off into la-la land.
11. Slowly come back to consciousness.
12. Grab a bite to eat.
13. Brush teeth.
14. Change into fresh PJs.
15. Read drowsily on the sofa under favorite cozy throw.
16. Snooze some more.
17. Move to bed.
18. Grab forty more winks.
19. Dream pleasant dreams.
20. Wake up refreshed.
21. Start all over again.

So what do you think? It's a tough schedule, but I'm sure I can handle it. (Notice I didn't forgo food. A girl's got to do what a girl's got to do.) I'll be glad to take a napfest for the team.

I like having a goal. And I like to schedule vacations so I have something to look forward to. So maybe I'm thinking I'll use some of my time off the end of this year to try a sleepcation.

In the meantime, I'll make do, tuck under a blanket, and take a siesta here and there when I can.

How about you? Tell me about your favorite napping adventures.

Catch some extra Zs when you can.

Until next time, yours in pleasant dreams...Therese

P.S. I've scheduled this post in advance. So while you're reading this, I'll be sleeping. Wink, wink.

The art of making natural things good

Making quick meals from healthy ingredients. It's a good thing.

I see this catchy tagline on a sign for a local pizza shop that I frequently pass.  The store is a "pizzarama" to be exact.

On a quick internet search I don't see these words attributed to anyone, so it seems the small business owner coined this turn of phrase or maybe saw it somewhere else and liked it for himself.

I like this collection of words, too. What is this gentleman saying to those who pass his shop?

My guess is he wants to make a statement that you can take simple ingredients and turn them into something fantastic without much fuss.

What is he doing? He's taking dough, tomatoes, cheese, spices...and turning those awesome natural ingredients into a beautiful pizza pie. Yum. Now that's art. Who can argue that?

Yes, let's agree the pizza shop owner is successful in the art of making natural things good.

Passing this pizza shop sign always makes me think about my own life. I, too, work on making natural things good every day myself.

I've always enjoyed food and cooking, but lately I've been on a kick to tirelessly take simple ingredients and make something fast and fabulous for quick, healthy dinners.

Even Cookie Monster realizes that
too many cookies will make you feel bad.

I'll admit that in days past I would come home and eat a cookie (or two or three or more!) and nothing else for dinner. I was too tired and lazy to do any more than that.

Not surprisingly, I didn't always feel so hot eating dinners like that. I wasn't really eating too much food, just not always the right balance of good things.

But no more.

I'm motivated to walk the talk. I'm energized to live what I believe. My updated philosophy is that it doesn't take a lot to make a good, quick meal on a weeknight.

What's my definition of a good, quick weeknight meal? A meal that takes anywhere from five or ten minutes to no more than half an hour to prepare.

And I'm making it work night after night. Tim Gunn from "Project Runway" would be proud of me making it work.

If I share with friends what I've made for a weeknight dinner, I can almost hear them groan wondering how I have the energy to pull that seemingly complex meal together after working all day.

Take it from me. It can be done. It's not as time-consuming as it sounds.

There are lots of good, natural and healthy food choices that don't take much time to prepare. Most nights I don't get home from work or exercise until 8 p.m. If I run an errand, my ETA could be 9 or 10 p.m.

So when I shop for food, I keep that in mind. I aim to buy ingredients that I can assemble easily and cook up quickly.

It does help that I usually roast veggies on the weekend to have at the ready all week long. If roasting veggies is not the art of making natural things good, I don't know what is.

Roasting propels vegetables into another dimension, bringing out all their inherent and sweet goodness. Carrots, yellow squash, zucchini, eggplant, sweet potatoes, asparagus, Brussels sprouts.... Oh, the list goes on. If it grows in dirt, we'll eat it, especially when roasted.

Roasted golden beets are easy to prepare
and a nice addition to salads.

Lately I've been roasting golden beets in foil at 400 degrees until a knife goes easily inserted in the center. Easy to peel the skin off then, I like the beets chunked in my lunch salads. I'll even eat cold slices of the beets, sweet like candy, with some nice stinky cheese and bread.

Yes, having food prepped or prepared in advance certainly makes it easier to pull together a great meal, but what other natural ingredients are my go-to standbys for quick, healthy dinners?

How do I take natural ingredients and artfully make a good-delicious, yet also good-healthy, dinner for us on a weeknight?

Some simple, but satisfying meals we enjoy are:

A little bit of fish at the top of this plate.
With a lot of roasted veggies. Yum.



• Boneless chicken thighs, drumsticks, and cutlets. These all cook up so quickly in a pan on the cooktop. There are so many simple sauces and marinades to dress up our chicken and make it unique from one night to another: BBQ, teriyaki, lemon and olive oil, balsamic vinegar, pesto, and on and on.
• Fish, oh, that's always quick, fish. I either take out a frozen pack from Trader Joe's (they have so many kinds to choose from) the night before or some nights I run into the nearby supermarket and buy some fresh wild-caught Silverbrite salmon.

  

  Scallops are quick and easy to make.
  And so is zapping some fresh English peas
  and sautéeing some greens for healthy sides.

  Some butter, lemon, nice spices and herbs. That's all we need to make a light and healthy meal.
• Scallops. Pan-frying in olive oil caramelizes this luscious goodness from the sea. Oh, yes, scallops are a great and easy meal. 
• Shrimp. Need I say more? We are always happy with shrimp. You can defrost pre-cooked, boil some fresh shrimp in Old Bay seasoning, or grill some quickly on a skewer. We eat shrimp every which way you can think of. With cocktail sauce. In a salad. With sides. With pasta. 
• Did I say pasta? Pasta is a quick and versatile meal. We love it with any variety of tomato sauces (Italian gravy), pesto, or some good olive oil. With crab, clams, mushrooms, Parmesan cheese, beans, greens, ricotta, mozzarella, ground meat, meatballs, sausage. Oh, pasta, how many ways can I love you? So many. 




A quick meal of natural goodness.


• We also throw any grains or beans into the quick-dinner mix as a side or part of the main course. It's easier now to find in stores pre-cooked brown rice, quinoa, lentils, and freekeh (who knew hubby would like freekeh?) for nights when all the time you want to expend is the time it takes to zap-heat something good and hearty in the microwave. And we always have on hand cans of black beans, chickpeas, white and red kidney beans, pinto beans.... Nutritious beans get the job done!
• Sautéed greens, any variety, always do a great job to round out many a healthy meal. I love my wok. So easy, so quick. Such natural goodness comes from my wok.
• And I really like hearty sandwiches for a quick meal. Grilled veggie burgers, portobello mushrooms, turkey burgers, prosciutto, roast beef. These are all great starts to a delicious meal. I'll scope out what's in the fridge and throw anything and everything together. You just can't go wrong. I add any greens we have raw or cooked: romaine, spinach, basil, broccoli rabe, sprouts, pea shoots, kale, Swiss chard... All these help make a hearty bundle of goodness between two slices of nice bread. Make it even better and throw on some ripe tomato, avocado, bacon, slices of provolone, Havarti, fresh mozzarella.... Mmm, the list goes on. All you need is a wee bit of creativity to turn a sandwich into a work of art.
• Pizza. Just like the shop owner making natural things good, it's a no-brainer to bring home lovely ingredients to easily throw together a variety of delectable combinations. Pizza. That's amore! 
• Breakfast for dinner. Eggs, waffles, pancakes, bacon, chicken sausages, frittata of any kind, cereals (I'm always a sucker for a quick pot of fresh-cooked oatmeal, cream of wheat, or multi-grains with maple syrup, butter, honey, brown sugar, walnuts, raisins, blueberries...). Any breakfast food for dinner makes it a "backwards" day in our house. My kids loved when I declared a backwards day when they were little. I still love breakfast for dinner to this day. Just call me a big kid. Yum.
• Last, but not least, some nights, a good old-fashioned PBJ sammy with a nice tall glass of milk hits the spot. Trader Joe's chunky peanut butter with roasted flaxseed and a good fruit jam or butter on some nice bread always makes me happy.

It works out for me that both hubby and I like leftovers and simple meals. For those nights when we don't feel like cooking, we are both happy to eat the meal from the night before.

And when there aren't any leftovers to be had, I'm also okay with just a good hunk of cheese, some spinach and kale yogurt dip with good bread or crackers, a cucumber or a handful of carrots, a glass of wine, and some fruit and chocolate as enders. That's a well-rounded meal right there. No work. No fuss.

For nights when I need a break from cooking and feel like something light myself, hubby is always fine with pulling out some of Trader Joe's frozen goodies since he'll have his pick of the many pre-made healthy pizzas, shrimp or chicken gyoza potstickers, pierogies, mini chicken tacos, and the like that I stock up for him.

Hubby and I also like any of Trader Joe's ravioli selection. Butternut squash ravioli is a favorite, with lobster ravioli a close second. And there are other wonderful varieties to choose from. All you have to do is boil water and add some pesto or butter to your ravioli. Nothing easier than that. Trader Joe's and other supermarkets, such as Wegman's and Whole Foods, with their healthy, natural food sections have themselves become masters at the art of making natural things good.

Wow! This list of natural goodness for quick meals makes me hungry. It makes me want to yell out that life is good in appreciation of all the wonderful food accessible to us on this good earth.

Yes, I've come a long way since my cookie-gobbling dinners, but I'm not saying that I never eat dessert before dinner while I'm cooking! I do like to eat as soon as I get home, so I have to start preparing good stuff right away before I reach for too many snacks.

It's become increasingly important to me, though, to take an interest and care about what I eat, since I know I'll feel better and healthier in the end. My family and I are worth taking the time to cook real food to care for our bodies and souls.

If you read me, you know I like food.

I also appreciate how rewarding it can be to elevate the process of nourishing our bodies to an art form, finding pleasure and joy in:

• Gathering good food to bring home for ourselves and our families.
• Preparing natural ingredients with love and noticing both the effort and the outcome. 
• Sharing our bounty and leisurely enjoying meals at the table with those we care about.

If we don't stress about all this and let it happen naturally, all this process of nourishment becomes an art that can make us and those we share with very satisfied and happy.

Although I've cultivated my interest in good food over the years and am happy to take more time to prepare meals on weekends and days off, there's no reason we can't eat just as well on weeknights if I bring home good ingredients that are quick and easy to make.

What artful tricks do you employ to turn natural ingredients into something good for your weeknight dinners? How do you practice the art of making natural things good?

Please share your tips and experiences. I'd love to hear from you.

Until next time, yours in fun and cooking quick and good meals...Therese

When we know better

 "I'm doing better than I did when I didn't know better." I love the simply clear wisdom of Maya Angelou. This insight rings so true. Sometimes we just don't know how to deal with something until we understand and we're ready.

Aha! I get it!

Do you know what I mean? You know when you know. Aha!

When we experience an insight, the saying is "the light bulb goes off in our head." I've never understood that reference myself. If the light bulb goes off, aren't you in the dark? Doesn't the light bulb go on as you see the light?

Anywho, Oprah Winfrey is fortunate to personally know Maya Angelou as her "mentor-mother-sister-friend." Wouldn't that be wonderful to have Ms. Angelou as your mentor? What wisdom she imparts!

On Oprah, though, I can't say I was ever one of her "ultimate viewers," but then again, over the years, I did find myself tuning in to her weekday show at 4:00 p.m. EST if, say, I was home on a day off. The topics were usually of some interest. I certainly liked when she had an insightful guest on such as Maya Angelou.

There were times in the early years, though, when the big O got on my nerves and I switched the channel. But maybe that was before Oprah knew better, as Maya says? Yes, Oprah certainly got better with age just like the rest of us.

So I don't remember really what made me set up my DVR to tape every day of Oprah's year twenty-five, 2010-2011 Farewell Season. But that I did. I guess I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. I could always delete the shows if I lost interest, so I had nothing to lose. But I didn't delete. Now I didn't watch each episode every day, but I'd do marathons on the weekend when I found some spare time.

Although I don't consider myself a fanatic, a true follower or fan of others, I had to admit I enjoyed Oprah's approach in her last season. She was not perfect, as none of us are, but she definitely gave direction for a schedule of topics to make us think. She and her guests gave me lots to think about that year.

And so when her last episode aired and the show ended, I was naturally curious about Oprah's new venture, OWN, the Oprah Winfrey Network, and decided to check it out.

As one who enjoys learning, observing others, and thinking about new ways to grow, I found that Oprah's programming was feeding a hunger I had. Never one to deny that I can easily spend a night after a long day's work sitting in front of the boob tube watching mindless TV, I also appreciate shows that challenge my beliefs and provide another perspective from my own or one I may want to consider.

The first show I started taping on OWN was Oprah's Master Class, described as "an unprecedented look into the minds of modern masters making a unique impact on the world and the lessons they've learned along the way."

After watching the farewell season, what I liked about this new show's format was that Oprah was not on camera as the interviewer. The celebrity sits in front of a stark portrait background and talks to camera. Oprah sparingly narrates before and after commercials, allowing the "master" to share their life lessons directly with you, the viewer.

Some of my favorite episodes featured Jane Fonda, Goldie Hawn, Ted Turner, Maya Angelou, and Morgan Freeman. Even episodes with some others that I wasn't sure I'd watch captivated my interest.

It was refreshing to hear Jane Fonda talk about mistakes she's made, notably in Vietnam, and admit that she had ineffectively dealt with challenges and low self-esteem through bulimia. She seemed content that she was finally comfortable in her own skin. She was okay after all these years with finally admitting that she was not perfect. She's right. We are not perfect. It's a sign of growth when we can accept that.

And Goldie Hawn shared her lifelong goal and guiding principle to simply be happy. The bubbly, ditzy blonde from Laugh-In shared her own brand of wisdom as she encouraged viewers to "use your wisdom" and "live your life through all the ups and downs and never stop learning and growing."

Hawn, 66, was not shy about aging and promised that the "beauty of getting older is the surprise." Hawn asks herself frequently what else can she do to make the world a better place with the wisdom she's accrued over the years. She urges us to give back whenever we can. Wonder, innovation, and creativity certainly are keeping Hawn young at heart.

Another show I've gravitated to on OWN is Oprah's Next Chapter. This show's format has Oprah interviewing fascinating celebrities, not on a studio stage, but on their turf, in their own comfort zone.

I really enjoyed the episode with legendary feminist/activist Gloria Steinem and another two-parter with actor and humanitarian Sean Penn on his work in disaster-ridden Haiti.

Aerosmith rocker Steven Tyler, through all the ups and downs of his life journey, shared his take on forgiveness as the answer to every problem. I was even pleasantly surprised by Oprah's visit with Lady Gaga and her mom. Lady G's candor divulging her sometimes dark struggles with creativity certainly held my interest.

Yet another favorite was a two-part episode with inspiring life coach Tony Robbins who The New York Times dubbed "the high priest of human potential."

Robbins who had a painful childhood shared his viewpoint that "not getting what you want sometimes is part of the plan. Sometimes it helps someone else. Sometimes not getting what you want is the most valuable experience of your life."

Robbins elaborated on the recurring theme that life's not about getting what you want. "Life's about becoming more." Right on, Tony, holding on to a sense of entitlement does us no service. We are all lucky and privileged to live on this good earth!

Robbins also called for us to uncover our spirituality and to "live with a heart open to giving and supporting things beyond yourself." Good, solid thoughts and common themes across the episodes.

In addition to hearing celebrities talk about real-life, important issues, these shows on OWN have also exposed me to places and conditions I may never have access to. I appreciated the opportunity to be a virtual companion on Oprah's trip to India. I was touched by the family of five, including three daughters, that Oprah visited.

The family, living on $200 a month in the infamous slums of Mumbai live, eat, cook, and sleep in one 10-foot-by-10-foot concrete room. Despite their lack of material possessions, it was evident that happiness certainly lived within those close walls. Although I could see in the father's eyes that he ached to better take care of his family, he was providing for them the most important elements of all: love and care.

In part two of the India visit, the Women of India episode, Oprah also sat down with five women from diverse backgrounds to talk about marriage, careers and family. Then, Oprah visited the "city of widows," where 16,000 women have sought refuge after their husbands died.

It made me sad to know that women who were once the backbones of their families were later driven away from their homes as throw-away members of society, starving and sick on the streets. Of course, there are some who are trying to help them and make a difference, but so much more needs to be done.

And then there were other episodes that intrigued me with perspective on how others live.

One of my favorites that I've saved to view again some other time was titled America's Most Unusual Town, highlighting Oprah's day in Fairfield, Iowa, the town that meditates together. The community and its people all seemed so idyllic, serene, and peaceful that I began to question the similarities to a cult mindset. Why is it so hard to trust sheer happiness at face value?

But Oprah said she "walked away feeling fuller than when I came in, full of hope and a sense of contentment and deep joy, knowing for sure that in the craziness of the world that seems to bombard us at every angle, there is always the consistency of stillness."

Can't argue with that. Maybe I'll visit Fairfield, Iowa, someday.

Another episode that fascinated me was America's Hidden Culture, where Oprah sat down with four Hasidic wives and mothers in Brooklyn, New York, for a no-holds-barred interview about their unusual way of life. No topic was off limits and the conversation wast thought-provoking. Really made me think about the typical American values and way of life.

I've mentioned a number of episodes I've enjoyed, but I've only touched the surface in my own quest for knowledge. There are certainly more programming options on OWN that have piqued my interest. I haven't yet even had a chance to watch Oprah's Lifeclass or Super Soul Sunday.

I hope to check out these shows soon since they also cover some of the themes I'm interested in: Inner peace, serenity, happiness, joy, balance, the power of forgiveness, living fearlessly, spirituality, and being the person you were meant to be. Healthy nourishment for mind, soul, and body. Makes me thirst for more time to learn.

Every chance we can, when we expose ourselves to all that's out there, we will know better, as Maya Angelou has so eloquently shared. And when we know better, how can we not respond and grow? We can't go back to what we were before once we know better.

There is so much to learn in this life that I ache for the time to take it all in. I want to be a sponge and absorb the knowledge from all the masters around me. We're all lucky. If we open our hearts and minds to possibilities, then we're not done learning until we are done.

This good earth provides us with so much potential to give more. Just small specks in the universe, we each can share our knowledge and be a catalyst for change. In ourselves. And in others.

Aha! I can only go forward when I know better. Thanks, Maya!

Until next time, yours in learning and experiencing those special Aha! moments...Therese

P.S. I have no stock or vested interest in Oprah Winfrey's new network. :) I just know what I like and I've found the OWN programming to be a refreshing change from the current mix of reality shows and the like. Check it out if you think you're interested. Enjoy!

I enjoy you

Really. I do. I like you.

You interest me. You fascinate me.

We are the same. We are different. I see some of myself in each of you. Maybe that's why we've connected at some point in our lives, then or now. And today we've reconnected somewhere, maybe even in the social media landscape. I connect with you in my everyday life, on Facebook, Twitter, and even here through my blog.

Whether you actively participate in the conversation or you're okay to just read and observe, we share some interests. But yet we are diverse. And that is good with us both. You don't judge. I like that about you.

You've made my good life richer. You've added another dimension to my very busy, but normal, existence. There's a great chance we don't regularly see each other, if ever, but it's nice to know you're there. I enjoy you.

Yes, I do enjoy you. You are passionate. Your passion can be inspiring and infectious. And you are not like the rest. You are each your own unique combination across quite a spectrum of interests.

You care about:

Politics.
TV. Film. Books. Music. Pop culture.
History.
Religion. Your beliefs. Your faith or lack thereof.
Life-long learning.
The meaning of life.
Causes that are important to you.
Communities you belong to.
Animals. Those you own. Others you also love or long for.
Gardening. Herbs.
Sports. Those you watch. Those you participate in.
Vacations. Your favorite go-to place. Your paradise.
Hiking. Adventures. Travel.
Taking time to do the things you enjoy most.
Food. Wine. Beer. Bacon.
Cooking. Great restaurants. The ultimate meal.
Healthy living. All things natural.
Children. Grandchildren. Family. Friends.
Special occasions you're planning.
Your dreams and hopes.
Who and what you want to be.
Your bucket list.
Connecting with others and everyday life.

You care about all of this and so much more.

If you don't see yourself here in this limited list, know that I really do enjoy you and all your diverse passions. You are just so damn interesting, it's hard not to.

You are colorful.

And you share without hesitation. You are colorful. You are funny, snarky, and irreverent. You are bold. You are nostalgic. You have an opinion and you're not afraid to share it.

Yet you don't judge. You let others be. Always a sign of confidence and strength. You are comfortable in your own skin. I admire and enjoy that about you.

You share both happiness and disappointments, births and deaths. You make me smile. Sometimes you make me cry as my heart aches for any pain you're experiencing. But then you make me chuckle.

And I like it when you make me laugh out loud. My loved ones within earshot will ask me to recount your news and your clever anecdotes. You amuse them also. Why wouldn't you? You are awesome.

So it's no wonder this has been a good experience connecting with you. I enjoy you.

Recently I saw a friend of friends from many years in the past. She casually exchanged news from Facebook with another friend. After we chatted awhile ourselves, I mentioned that I'd look her up on Facebook, thinking it might be fun to get to know her again.

She said sure, but then followed with, "You're not one of those people who posts pictures of their food, are you?"

"Yes, I am. We shouldn't be friends on Facebook then."

Maybe she was shocked at my quick and very blunt response, but if she had no problem sharing her opinion and pre-judging those who share any particular interest, then I had no problem responding as such without hesitation or qualm.

Although I know that I am so much more than any one interest I may have, it was obvious to me that this person would be annoyed and not appreciate seeing me in her news feed when I share with the foodie subculture I love being a part of my passion for food, cooking, and all things Trader Joe's.

I get it if it's not her interest, so I don't want to subject her to that.

At this point in my life, though, I'm also more comfortable looking out for my own interests, so I'm not okay with being judged, allowing myself to feel inadequate, or feeling the need to defend who I am or what I believe in. 

So at the end of the night, we hugged and said our goodbyes, commenting that it was nice to see each other again. All was good with how we left things.

Of course, this interaction made me think about who we each connect with and why. Do we necessarily need to share the same interests to get along, to live in so-called peace and harmony?

No, I don't think so. It seems to me that the heart of any connection and harmony is tolerance.

Tolerance. The capacity for or the practice of recognizing and respecting the beliefs or practices of others.

Do I agree with everyone I come in contact with? With everyone and everything said on Twitter or in my Facebook newsfeed?

Heck, no.

Do I respect their opinions, passions, and interests, even when they conflict at times with my own?

Hell, yes.

Just having celebrated July 4th in the United States of America, don't we all have an obligation to uphold the dreams and pursuits of our forefathers? Wasn't tolerance of each individual's beliefs and the freedom to practice said beliefs the ideal they were willing to fight for in the American Revolutionary War?

If today we can't tolerate diversity in thought and practice, if we don't want to be exposed to something that is different from the way we think, then we can choose to turn away, to not participate.

On social networking sites, if we don't want to see someone's pictures from a vacation or a good meal, or read someone's passionate post about politics, religion, what they did today, or even their hobby that we're really not interested in, then we shouldn't look. Or maybe we shouldn't be "friends," if we have no mutual interests or, at least, a mutual respect.

If we turn away from those who are different from us too frequently, though, it may be that we're stunting an opportunity for introspection and self-growth. It seems there's no good reason to let someone else's opinions threaten who we are and what we believe in. Who knows? We may be surprised to find some common ground. If not, we can always agree to disagree.

At the end of the day, I am grateful to be free to enjoy you and all your diverse beliefs (thank you, founding fathers!). I appreciate what we share in common and am quite content to tolerate what I may not always agree with or understand. It seems we can't go wrong when we treat each other the way we want to be treated. With respect and tolerance.

Martin Scorsese is quoted as having said, "As I've gotten older, I've had more of a tendency to look for people who live by kindness, tolerance, compassion, a gentler way of looking at things."

With maturity, this approach is working for me.

Less judgement. More tolerance.

One year ago this past July 4th I started out on this blogging adventure, not totally sure where it would take me. I still don't have all the answers, but I do know that I wish I had more time to write.

This experience has been so much more than I had ever imagined. I'm happy to share here with you and I hope you enjoy that I do.

Thanks for reading! Although it's nice to know you're there, I'm always interested to hear your point of view and turn this into more of a conversation.

I enjoy you. Really, I do.

Until next time, yours in growth and tolerance...Therese

It was thirty-three years ago today

It was June 9, 9:30 a.m., in the Philadelphia Convention Hall and Civic Center. The year was 1979.

Thirty-three years ago today, I graduated with my fellow classmates from Cardinal Dougherty High School, in the Olney section of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

All graduates are happy on their big day. I was especially excited and happy since it was my privilege to deliver the valedictory address to all my fellow students and their guests.

The term “valedictorian” comes from the Latin phrase, “vale dicere,” which means, “to say farewell.” A valedictorian address is the final farewell to classmates, usually including messages of nostalgia and thanks, along with inspirational tones urging the class to go out into the "real world" and begin their new life, wherever that may take them.

Our senior class consisted of 1060 students since our Roman Catholic high school was one of the largest in the country. Our school building was too small to hold the graduating class and all their guests, so our ceremony took place at the aforementioned Philadelphia Convention Hall and Civic Center.

The large civic center could certainly hold us all with a capacity up to 12,000. I remember the nun who worked with me while I practiced my speech delivery letting me know that very likely there would be at least 10,000 people in attendance. Not trying to spook me or anything she was.

You figure, with almost 1100 students, along with faculty, that leaves about eight to ten guests for each graduate, easy to attain when including parents, grandparents, and siblings, especially with all the large Catholic families that made up the school. Heck, unlike today's graduations, there was no need for an imposed guest limit or required tickets since our venue was so large. I even remember my aunts, uncles, and cousins attending to hear my address.

Looking up the Philadelphia Convention and Civic Center now on Wikipedia, I find some facts I don't know if I ever knew.

The large hall held Democratic and Republic National Conventions, and President Lyndon B. Johnson had spoken there for a campaign appearance on August 29, 1964. Four days later, The Beatles, my favorite band of all time, played the venue on September 2, 1964, during their first tour of the United States. I didn't know I stood where Paul, John, George, and Ringo did! A year later, the Rolling Stones played there during their third American tour. That's also cool!

I'm most fascinated and honored to know that Pope John Paul II, Martin Luther King, and Nelson Mandela all spoke there also. I don't think I ever knew that I stood at a podium on a stage where these admired minds and famous feet had stood. I'm amazed and thrilled by that information new to me.

And how did I get there on that stage? I can see myself in my mind's eye working on the humble beginnings of my valedictory speech, sprawled across my twin bed in the room of my childhood home, scrawling my ideas on theme tablet in pen, with lots of crossing out and corrections and additions in the margins.

I also fondly remember researching my speech. I remember going to the school library to hunt for inspirational quotes. Remember, in 1979 there was no Internet with vast quantities of information at our fingertips.

So fast forward to 2012. Knowing today was the class of 1979's graduation anniversary, I hunted in my basement for what I remember was a box of collected lifetime memories to find my valedictory speech, to share with you today what I had thought was important to share with my fellow classmates thirty-three years ago.

I've always remembered my opening line and the gist of the address, but this is the first time in very many years that I've held and read the copy I took up with me on stage that day.

Reading this speech, typed out in very large font on erasable paper and triple-spaced for easy reading at the podium in the event my memory failed with the adrenaline of the moment, I'm fascinated by how much I've changed since 1979 and yet how much I am the same.

I still seek out and love perusing quotes that mean something to me to this day. And there are themes in this speech I must have been interested in then that I am still thinking about today. Those who know me best will recognize those themes.

I remember being called to the podium to give the farewell address before the academic awards were presented and diplomas were conferred. The stage was bright, and I looked out to a darkened, but evidently quite full house, with every seat and row filled from the floor to the ceiling. I remember the vastness of the hall that held such a large audience that I needed to address.

My goal was to warmly let each graduate know that I shared their experiences, good times and bad, and through it all, we were ready for the world, all of us prepared to face whatever was ahead. And we'd never forget where we came from no matter what. Our wonderful school we affectionately called CD gave us all the tools we needed.

I originally wrote in my speech our loving school nickname, CD, but was told by the nun coaching me not to use the acronym, and to be sure to use the full name only. I knew I could say whatever I wanted once I was up on the stage, but that day the good school girl in me did what was expected and adhered to the sister's request, er, ultimatum.

I even carried out the very slow and forced diction she prescribed in pronouncing our school name, Cardinal Dougherty High School, since she advised it would all be a jumble in such a large hall otherwise. I wince when I think that I didn't just do what was natural to me and give my fellow classmates at least one "CD" reference, but I survived and so did my fellow graduates. I'm sure I'm the only one who remembers this context, so in the end, it didn't matter, but we all have our regrets.

Most rewarding that day, as I delivered my farewell address and looked out to my classmates, I could see the softly lit faces of those in the first few rows. I was touched as I saw tears streaming down their cheeks. I knew I hit a nerve within them. I struck a chord. My speech resonated with them. It was a very happy moment for me, one of my most memorable lifetime experiences.

And so I'd like to share my address again with any classmates who may like to reminisce about that special time in our lives.

In honor of and on behalf of all my fellow graduates, wherever they may be, here is my valedictory address to you from so many years ago:


Valedictorian Therese Ferretti
Cardinal Dougherty High School
Class of 1979

Your Excellency Bishop Graham, Father Trinity, members of the faculty, parents, relatives, fellow students, and friends of Cardinal Dougherty High School:

It was Virgil, the Latin scholar, who wrote, "For they can conquer who believe they can." With this note of self-confidence we can look back on our years at Cardinal Dougherty High School and realize how important they were to us.

We know that how we have spent these past four years has shaped our lives and will determine our futures. Of the four years, the last was a different experience. A change was in the air. We knew the time was coming when it would be our turn to face the challenges of life.

We've learned to read about the world in the newspapers, observe it on television, and hear it call to us on the radio. Now we are getting our chance to take part in world events. We have learned that we don't have solutions for every crisis, but we are excited about the prospects of searching for answers and the thrill of success in finding them.

We have had many experiences here at Cardinal Dougherty High School, experiences that brought growth, happiness, maturity, and even disappointment. These encounters with faculty, administration, and fellow students, bound with the love and care of our parents and families, have strengthened us and given us confidence.

With this self-confidence we find that we are prepared to attain the goals we have set for ourselves. We see one another moving from adolescence into young adulthood. However, our education does not stop here.

Whatever direction our lives take, there will always be new learning experiences. What we hope to achieve is the power to think sensibly about what is to be done and the strength and courage to do what we know is right. This is a value that has influenced us all our years and we strive to live up to it.

As we realize that we have made it through difficult and crucial years of our lives, together, at Cardinal Dougherty High School, we recognize a special bond. We hope and pray that this tie will never be forgotten or abandoned, for this bond represents one of our foremost Christian values, the value to love and to share, together.

At this time, many are saddened by the realization that this is an end.

Yes, it is, but we must also look at it as a beginning, a beginning to work our way back to each other, if not physically, mentally, because the bond holding us together is that of mind, and we can always remember in our hearts the times we have loved and shared.

Reflecting on this thought, we must go out with joy to love, to live, and to learn.

e.e. cummings expresses our gratitude for life in one of his poems:

'i thank You God for most this amazing
day: for the leaping greenly spirits of trees
and a blue true dream of sky; and for everything
which is natural which is infinite which is yes'

Until next time, yours in good times and nostalgia...Therese

P. S. Unfortunately, our great high school, Cardinal Dougherty, was closed at the end of the 2009-2010 academic year in a wave of Archdiocesan school closures. And the Philadelphia Civic Center was torn down in 2005 after more than a decade of inactivity. Both were larger-than-life institutions in their heyday.

Schools close, buildings are demolished, and things change. But some things will never be gone, and those are the memories we all hold dear. No one can take away our memories. I remember all this like it was yesterday. And it was thirty-three years ago today. Never forget to carve out some time to enjoy your own memories.